Comcast-Pitchforks and Torches

So I really have enjoyed my Comcast service. But alas some relationships are just destined to fail. And the stars aligned today to make it end very very poorly.
George and I have been trying to streamline our finances lately in an effort to prepared to expand our family (someday-not that soon though!). So to that end George called Comcast yesterday to try and figure out how to lower our bill. They gave us a promo package that actually lowered our bill by $50 a month and UPGRADED our internet speed. In order to implement the faster service we had to go pick up a new modem. So today we ran a few errands and stopped by the Comcast building downtown to exchange it.

When walked up to the building there was a huge sign the said ‘FOR ALL EQUIPEMENT RETURNS AND EXCHANGES PLEASE FOLLOW THE ARROWS’. So we followed the signs to another building that turned out to be quite a far away. However, when we get there the lady in that building said ‘Oh yes we exchange all the equipment OTHER than that.” So now I am little annoyed but the woman offers to walk us over to other building where we started and get us served ahead of everyone else, since it is such a quick change out, for the inconvenience, which was very nice. So we walk all the way back over and I was really grateful she did come with us as the line was a little out of control.

We stood off to the side for a while until an agent became available. A few seconds after the woman began helping us another customer walked over. She was an older lady with her hair in curlers wrapped in a scarf. She started yelling at us in a thick Brooklyn accent “Yous guys in cames in after all of us! What makes you so f$%# special that you get served first?! We were all here first and we all think this is bulls!$%!” I was so shocked I blanked for a second. Then I look over and see all the other people in line nodding and/or yelling at us! Then the woman starts yelling “I have a spinal problem and I don’t need to be standing all day just for you to come in thinking you should get special treatment over me you brats!” Finally the women who walked us over says ‘I work here ma’am it is ok.” Like this is going to make it all better. She then tries to explain over this woman yelling that this is a quick change out and it will only be a moment. “I have a spinal problem and these little sh!*^ just walk in like they own the f%^$#@! place!” And she is just enraging everyone else over in the line and I have this image of these people chasing us down with pitchforks and torches. Finally I jump in because I have had just about enough of being publicly humiliated. Plus if I did not say something I knew George was going to and trust me…you would rather have me yell at you rather than get George mad enough to yell. So I said “Excuse me, I am not here for service issues, I am here for an equipment exchange. This should be done at the other building but because Comcast is stupid I had to come over here. They have another location for equipment to make it faster, but since we had to come over here they are letting us jump the line for 30 seconds. I understand you are in pain. But I did not make it so that there are only two people working 7 desks. If you wanna yell, yell at them.” She looked a little stunned and then said “Well we are all pretty upset that you think you are special but I understand why you would take advantage of system and make a cripple person be in pain longer.” Ok so now I had enough of trying to act like a lady and calm this woman down. “F#!^ you.” I said and turned around. So she just stormed off. Then I look back over and I see the guy in line in front of her talking and I hear him say “Well that was not their fault these people can’t get their business straight. Did you really have to curse at them and call them names first? You were kind of asking for it.” I could have kissed him. So she starts yelling at him about her back and crying. Then a young woman walks in and tells her to go wait in the car and she will wait in line for her and will call her on her cell phone when she gets to the front (I guess this is her daughter.) And all I could think was WHY DID THIS GIRL NOT WAIT IN HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE IF THIS IS SUCH A FREAKING ISSUE?! So the woman storms out and took her curlers with her. And oh by the way, while this has all occurred this woman is now 2nd in line and when we walked in she was 7th. So calm down Brooklyn Brawler.
Then I focus my attention back to the woman behind the counter who is telling us that this modem is the exact same one we have. So I ask if the one we have was working fine then what are we doing here? She looks at me like I am idiot and says “I have no idea.” So George argues with her saying we should be getting something different since our internet has been upgraded. She looks at George like is he retarded and says “No you are exchanging this because it was broken right?” I finally looked at George and told him I had to wait in the car or my head was going to explode.

When George came out a few minutes later and I thought flames were going to shoot out of his ears he was so mad. We left with the same modem we came with. When we got home I called Comcast to try and figure out if there is another piece of equipment we need or if the guy on the phone sent us down there for no flipping reason. I get a rep on the line and when I explain the issue to him and he flat out tells me “well I am not versed in how our products work so I am going to have to get you over to technical support.” Wow. I would die if I heard one of my reps say “I really do not know anything about or products so let me get you to someone else.” Then he transfers me back to the BEGINNING of the automated system. He does not transfer me to tech support directly. He transferred me back to fight AGAIN through the automated system to talk to someone. Grrrr!

I FINALLY talked to a person with a brain that was still communicating with their mouth. She informed me that the person who set up the work order set it up wrong and we need to go BACK to the service center to get the right modem. I flipped out and told the lady the whole ordeal. She was really sweet and offered me a credit which was nice. So now we have to go back. Let’s see if we actually get attacked physically this time!

So George and I called Direct TV and got a really great deal with them to lower our bill even more and get more services. So I call back to cancel Comcast. The woman asks me why I want to cancel and I tell her how horrified I am with the service that I have received today. I tell her the whole story and she pauses and says “Well why did you not just go through the line and avoid all of this ma’am? Does not sound like our fault you got yelled at.”

So to recap we walked all over creation, got yelled at by other customers because Comcast cannot deal with them in a timely manner, got talked to like we were retarded children, had to fight with the automated system, talk to stupid reps, and still are in the same place we started out this morning with the SAME MODEM WE HAD! Thus concludes our relationship with Comcast.

Our 1st Anniversary

♥1 year married and 4 years together as of today:) Best decision we ever made was to spend the rest of our lives together♥

Can-TANK-erous

I, like some other puppy parents, assumed that since my first child was perfect that my second one would be perfect as well. Benders story began with us in August of 2008 when, on a total whim, we picked up a Thrifty Nickel and saw an ad for boxer puppies. George had always talked about wanting an English bulldog. Ever since he was a little boy and saw the Ben and Jerry cartoon with the Bulldog named Spike it was his dream dog. But that was way out of our price range. But George loved the bully breeds so we settled on a boxer.

We came to the front door of the house and were greeted by 5 little adorable bundles of really happy puppies. We played with each one for a little bit and then asked the sellers which one they thought had the best personality. They pointed to the one with the little white spot on the back on his neck and said ‘Chomper’ which is what they called him. We cuddled with him for a little bit and George held him in his palm up to his face. The little puppy licked his nose and it was love. We named him Bender after the alcoholic robot from Futurama. We took him home that day and quite honestly I can’t really remember what life was like before him.

The first few weeks were the hardest as Bender was very frightened and did not like to be away from us ever. Kenneling him was an absolute nightmare. He would scream ALL NIGHT. Not just for an hour or so…ALL NIGHT. So George and I would carry him around in one hand everywhere we went. We had issues with him chewing on shoes but we got past that pretty easily.

George and I spent two and a half years planning our wedding in Jamaica. It was a long process and in the end totally worth it. However, it was a little all consuming and I know quite a few brides who have felt a little lost after the wedding. It is so much work and over so quickly how could they not feel a little sad. I was a little different as my wedding was kind of five whole days instead of just a couple of hours. Plus I was really happy that it was finally done. Life could now get to some kind of normality.

However, there was still a little emptiness. I needed a project of some kind or something to baby. As we were not ready for kids yet I wanted to get another dog. I also felt like Bender really needed a buddy. Sometimes he would just look at me like ‘Really? You are tired? But I am not done playing yet!’ after we had taken an hour walk and thrown the ball around the yard all afternoon. So began the search for a brother.

On April 15^th, tax day, Tank was born…and 16 weeks later to the day we brought him home. And our adventure began. Tank was a 100% different personality than Bender. Bender is a 60lb lap dog. He will just chill in bed or on the couch. Tank is a 60lb ball of need. He constantly needs to be pet. He cannot just lie next to you or in your lap. He needs 100% of your attention or he is not happy. Bender got over his shoe fetish pretty quick. Over a year later Tank is still on the constant prowl for my flip flops.

In the first few days when we brought Tank home he got a hold of one and looked up at me for permission to take it. I started after him and his eyes got wide, he lifted his head as high as he could (because if he did not he would have tripped on the shoe while running away) and took off in to the living room to munch on his treasure. When I entered the living room he dropped it and then proceeded to do a belly flop on the carpet directly over it with all four legs spread eagle. He looked up at me like ‘What shoe? There is no shoe here!’ and I immediately busted up laughing. Over a year later…it is getting old. He destroyed the heel of one of Georges dress shoes a couple months back and I thought he was going to be on Craig’s List before the day was done.

But the chewing is not limited to just shoes. Oh no! Our coffee tables upstairs and down, our couch, all four corners of our recliner, the handle on the recliner is a gnarled remnant of a handle now, and our rug in the living room is getting demolished strip by strip. He also ate one of the corks out of a bottle of wine that was on the wine rack in the kitchen. And of course it does not stop there. Anything extra he can get a hold of he will chew like nail polish bottles, socks, bath mats, q-tips, hair ties, purses, Georges knit caps, George’s baseball caps, and slippers. And my little angel Bender has become his partner in crime. He has corrupted my other baby to help him! There is no way Tank could get stuff off the kitchen table as it is very high. However, Bender gets it for him and then hands it over to his little brother. He NEVER did this before Tank. And I am not sure what Tank told Bender to get him to do this for him but I hope it was worth it. Maybe he promised him his share of food one night or something.

Then there is his rock fetish. He is constantly eating rocks from the landscaping in the back yard. I woke up one morning and found 3 rocks in his kennel the size of my thumb that he had eaten and made him sick. Along with the rocks he loves weeds and grass. And now he and Bender have taken to digging holes. On Mother’s Day Tank hit a line to the sprinkler system and was a drowning mud puppy when he came in to the house.

Now one of the reasons we call him Tank is because of the fact that his is about the least graceful dog you have ever seen. He just charges in a runs everything over. And if something is in his way that he cannot move…he flexes on it like ‘I’ll show you who the big dog is!’ He has several arch nemeses consisting of inanimate objects. He hates the broom and vacuum but I think that may be because when I am cleaning it is time I am not paying attention to him. He will bark for hours at the umbrella in the back yard, he hates the industrial broom in the garage when it is just sitting there, and don’t get me started on the mail box. And for each one he crouches down and growls and snarls and jumps around and barks like these items have just ticked him off to no end.

Just yesterday Tank and Bender ate my digital camera that Bender retrieved off the table. Then we had the neighbors over for a late Memorial Day bbq and they brought their kids. I was so proud of Bender and Tank as they were very well behaved with the kids. It has been a fear of mine that they will not be too happy when a baby comes home. But they played and did not get to rough. The little boy was playing tug with them and they did not pull to hard. At one point the boy laid in the grass and Bender and Tank pulled him all over the yard. It was very entertaining and good to see that they could behave. Later that night George told me that if they eat another camera we can put ‘Good with Kids’ on their Craigslist ad.

Then we have this morning which took the cake. I was on my weekly conference call with work and I hear Bender out back barking like something is really wrong. So I send George out to investigate. Come to find out the neighbors got a new dog and Tank was so anxious to meet him that he ran head first in to the fence and busted through a board to the other side. The neighbors were out there when it happened and said it was the funniest thing they have ever seen. The neighbors were very nice about it and we talked about possibly replacing the fence because clearly it needs it.

So clearly our 2^nd baby needs a lot of work. I would not trade him for the world…but there is a reason we call him can-Tank-erous.