Grandpa Jan

One year ago this week we lost Grandpa Jan. I have been thinking quite a bit about him this week, even more so the normal. A year ago at this time I struggled to put into words what he meant to me. But now that a year has passed I want to share a little about the man I called Grandpa.

Grandpa Jan married my Grandma Kitty right before I turned two. The story I have been told is that when Mom Dad and I lived in Fort Knox Kentucky they got a phone call from the posts Military Police. They advised Dad that a man and a woman had flown illegally into Fort Knox and landed claiming that they knew him. They told them that their names were Jan Ziegler and Arthea Bowesock. Well Dad knew Arthea was his mother but he did not know Jan. But he went down and signed for them. This story cracks me up. Only Grandpa Jan would pull a stunt like that. And in a post 9/11 world I cannot imagine anyone getting away with that today. Only Jan Ziegler. According to Dad on this trip Grandpa asked permission to marry Grandma.

When Ginger and I were little, the family would spend 1 week with Grandma Kitty and Grandpa Jan and 1 with Grandma and Grandpa Heard in the summer on a visit. I remember going to the lake, going out with him on his boat, flying with him in his plane, grilling, and playing in the bar. I think everyone has some concrete memories of childhood. Those are some of my most vivid. Ginger and I, and all of his grandkids, were his ‘buddies’ or is ‘Pollock’s’ as he called us. There are a few things I knew as a kid. Mom was the best at everything she did, Dad could always listen and give the best advice, and I would always be Grandpa Jan’s buddy.

As a child I did not really put together than Jan was not biologically related to me. I did not have a concept of divorce or that someone who I had known my whole life and I have called Grandpa would not be ‘really’ my grandpa. We did not have a personal relationship with my biological Grandpa Rick. I only ever met him a handful of times in my life. The Grandpas in my life were Grandpa Jan and Grandpa Heard. When I was 12 I saw a picture of my Great Grandpa Rick and Mom explained to me that Jan and Kitty had not gotten married until after I was born. I remember thinking “Oh… so he is not ‘really’ my Grandpa…but he is.” And that was all the thought I really gave to the issue. He was my Grandpa and I did not really care how that came to be nor did it matter. He always treated us like his own and Mom and Dad like his kids. So who cares?

When my Dad went to Korea for a tour in the Army we lived with Grandma Kitty and Grandpa Jan for a year. I was about 12 and in middle school at the time. Wapakoneta, where they lived, is a small town and I got picked on quite a bit. These kids in school all seemed to have come out of the womb together and the new girl from California was an easy target.

I am not sure if this was true but it is the story I remember hearing. Apparently at one point Grandpa called the school and told them that since our Dad was out of the country that Jan was ‘stand-in daddy’ and nothing better happen to us or he would have something to say about it. As I said before I am not sure if he really did that. But thinking he did offered a level of comfort that I can hardly describe. Knowing that even with Dad half a world away that I had a protector was a great gift. And I could not have asked for a better stand-in.

There were a few things about Grandpa that if you knew him at all, you knew these things about him. He was a former Marine who was very proud of his service to our country. He loved grilling the most amazing food as a master chef. He loved flying his plane as he was a pilot. And he loved taking his boat out on the lake. But most of all he loved his kids, his grandkids, his great-grandkids, and Kitty. He adored the restaurant Hooters and whenever he ate good food he would say ‘Them’s groceries’ with a hint of a southern drawl and a growl. And whenever anything was good at all he would throw back his head, close his eyes, and slowly drawl out the word ‘Mercy!’ He loved to go to Florida for the ‘Christmas’…which always seemed to mean from sometime after Thanksgiving through Valentine’s Day. He loved his motor home and his shop in the back of the house. He loved his pooch Gizmo, Fox News, and Bill O’Reilly. He loved his greenhouse, and his beautiful backyard with his waterfall and pond. His great-grandson Lucas dubbed his greenhouse and his yard the ‘jungle’ and from then on Lucas called Jan ‘Grandpa Jungle’.

Grandpa was the hardest working person I have ever met in my life. He would be gone before any of us were out of bed working in the shop. Then he would leave in the afternoon to work at Ford Motor Company until the late hours and come home. He always seemed to be on the go and that stress caught up with his heart over the years. He had high blood pressure and when Ginger and I were younger we would have ‘pamper grandpa time’. I would massage his back and Ginger would comb his hair. I think he was just indulging us but he loved the attention. When we lived with them I would give Grandpa a back massage every week. He always told me that his blood pressure went down after a massage and that always made me feel like I was helping.

Grandma Kitty and Grandpa Jan came out to Colorado for my graduation in 1998. Grandpa pulled out all the stops throwing an amazing party. He deep fried multiple turkeys and cook up a storm for my graduation party. You could smell the turkeys from blocks away at the school and people driving by just stopped to join in because it smelled so amazing. On this trip we went to Hooters and as usual Grandpa was buying up all the Hooters memorabilia he could for him and even for us. The problem with this trip was that they did not have a pair of Hooter shorts in Gingers size which was extra small. Now another thing about Grandpa was that he was charming…dangerously charming at times. He asked a Hooters waitress what size she wore and he discovered it was extra small. After a few whispers she went into the back, changed into jeans, and handed them over. Now you know damn well those Hooter Girls have heard it ALL! But Grandpa still managed to talk one out of her shorts. He was that kind of charming.

When Grandpa and Grandma came out for Gingers graduation we took them to a place here in the Springs called the Iron Springs Chateau. It is a dinner theater where they serve a family style meal with bowls of chicken, mashed potatoes, cornbread, and beans passed around the table. After dinner you go upstairs to the old fashioned theater where there is a melodrama performance. During an intermission they have a performance of follies. At one point during our visit they had a torch singer come out and while she belted out her sexy song she sat in Grandpas lap to serenade him. We were all cracking up because she had no idea what she was getting herself into. We have the greatest picture of all time with her in his lap, she has her lips puckered right up on his face, and the picture catches his head thrown back right in the middle of saying ‘Mercy’. And anyone who has seen that picture knows what he is in the middle of saying.

One of things about Grandpa was his love of family. There is nothing he would not do for us and he was so proud of what we all had become. During that same trip Dad took Grandpa and Grandma on a tour of ATMEL, the semi conductor company where both Dad and I worked. I will never forget as we walked around the building Dad introduced them to his coworkers as his Mom and Dad and not his Step-Dad. And every time he said Jan was his Dad, Jan stood up a little straighter, puffed out his chest a little, got a big grin on his face, and looked so proud. It was a really cool moment.

When George and I were getting married Grandma Kitty and Grandpa Jan determined they would not be able to make the trip to Jamaica for the ceremony. But they came out for my bridal shower. This was be the last time I saw Grandpa. They day they arrived I came over and we all sat around the table and cracked up laughing reminiscing. I am not sure I have ever seen Grandpa laugh so hard he had tears streaming down his cheeks at some of my memories as a child. Like the time I asked him why I never saw him and Grandma kiss…I won’t repeat Grandmas answer to me at the time but it was hysterical. Grandma then leaned over and kissed him. He then pretended to be grossed out and wiped his mouth with his sleeve. Then he gave her a loving look and winked. Both Grandma and Grandpa had forgotten about this but they thought it was hilarious that I remember it.


That week they came over to visit us at our new house and meet George. George and Grandpa hit it off really well and George grilled up some steaks. This was of course was a test for Grandpa which George passed as a good griller. If he had not I think Grandpa might have stopped the wedding. It was really important to be that Grandpa not only meet George but like him. My parents adore George but Grandpa was one of the most influential men in my life and I wanted him to approve. At one point in the visit Grandpa and I were standing on my deck looking out at the mountains and he put his arm around me. He told me he was very proud of me. He said “Man I’ll tell you Buddy. You done good for yourself. You gotta good life here. I a mighty proud of ya.” Then he looked over into the house at George. He said ‘You know that man loves you.” With a smile I said “I know.” He hugged me tighter and said “That makes me feel good. I know he will take care of you when I am gone.” I just laughed and said “Oh please. You are tough. You are gonna probably out live him and then you will be stuck with me all over again!” He laughed and gave me a big hug. I will hold that memory with me always.

He has been gone a year now and I think about him all the time. I think about him when I grill or cook. I think about him when I pass Hooters or hear a clip of something totally crazy that Bill O’Reilly has said lately and I laugh thinking about how Grandpa would have agreed with him no matter what. When I am gardening or making the grand plans for our deck and yard. When I pass the wedding photo of Jan and Kitty I have in my living room. And I carry him in my heart every day. And I hope wherever he is that he knows how much he is missed.